Actual sick person selfie with no makeup. Ignore my dead eyes. 

Let's start with a few points of clarification. My immune system is pretty average. It's not like it was 5 years ago when the chemo killed my bone marrow and I made everyone take their temperature before coming inside my house. My risk of getting a cold or flu is that of a normal person. The problem is what happens after. My digestive system is a delicate flower, with very specific needs. Post-nasal drip can cause me to projectile vomit (TMI) which in turn ruins me for days. Throwing up is not good for you. My already pretty much constantly sore body (from the mastectomy and the lupron mostly) turns into something along the lines of what I imagine car crash victims feel. Plus, the sore throat makes it hard to drink enough fluids, of which I need more than an average human, which is not helped at all by the puking. And down we spiral.

So yes, I can visit your baby (I won't touch their snot and then rub it in my face, I will produce and show off my favorite hand sanitizers - of which I have the best in order to encourage constant use.) What gets me everytime is airplanes. Festering boxes of disease.

Here's a fun to know tidbit. Those paper masks? They only protect you for 15 minutes. They might make you feel safe, or ridiculous, or whatever, but eventually they are going to become unsterile and then you are breathing the same damn air as everyone else.

Steve and I have all but given up holiday travel because I am convinced I am going to get ebola every time I step onto a packed, holiday flight.

I know you love your mom, and that you spent a lot of money on that plane ticket, and that there is an entire oeuvre of movies dedicated to getting home for the holidays. Everyone on the plane is super grateful to have you hacking up a lung into the recycled air.

So that is how I got sick. Despite basically coating myself head to toe in these:

Saje Clean Hands Cleansing Hand Lotion | Aesop Ressurection Rinse-Free Hand Wash

Ok, so now that that is established. I am sick. It's probably just a head cold. I never had a fever above 100. I am in paroxysms of agony every second that I am not sleeping. I've developed a gross aversion to eating (aforementioned vomiting being a real thing) with the exception of bananas, oatmeal, toast, and tea. And the occasional piece of candy, to like, keep me alive. I might give myself a two hour facial when I'm felled by chemotherapy, but when my face is congested I find it hard to remove the fuzz from my teeth, let alone groom myself. My hair is pretty shiny because hot showers are basically proof of a higher power in this world.

I go into crisis mode when it comes to my face. I do exactly enough so that I don't develop some kind of massive chin zit, and so my already parched dry body doesn't turn into the kind of flaky, angry red patches that will haunt me for months after this stupid cold is gone. This is extra challenging when the only joy in my life is dipping myself in hot water.

Here's what the routine looks like. Drag self from bed (or not) and apply Micellar water to a cotton pad. Wipe on face. Try not to throw up when I realize how much dirt is on my face when all I've done for the last 8-10 hours is sleep in my bed. Spray face with moisturizing toner water. Apply super pure to acne chin. Apply new magic Venn all in one  anti-aging  serum which is fairly epic, and which so far lives up to it's claim of hydrating, smoothing, and whatnot as much as the four other things I'd probably be using in it's place. Cover entire face with DIY Acne Oil, which has migrated into a super pure bottle because I can't be trusted to open things without spilling. Apply something to dry lips. I can't find any of my balm dot coms or other lip balms so I've resorted to using the surprisingly moisturizing Glossier Lip balm, which is oil based. Return to bed exhausted and fall into the bliss of a netflix binge. 

In summary, I do the least of everything when I'm sick. Including this video, which is on my phone because I broke my beloved camera. My iphone works awesome for these photos, but the video quality leaves something to be desired. wah wah wahhhh. Cold & Flu Dena is also a whiny Dena. Amazing what I can survive and then the common cold just destroys me.